By Eric Wolf Schoen
As The unelected President Elon Musk and our Donald ask millions of Federal workers to submit 5 accomplishments in the last week, you know our turn as flag waving Americans is next.
So I thought about 5 accomplishments I had, and thought I would share them with you This way, you can think about how you will answer the question before it’s your turn.
I’m not an egg eater, but I had my first omelette, a cheese one this week. It was ok, but not something I would eat on a steady basis. Particularly with the price of eggs and the egg shortage, I would rather donate my share to those who crave eggs. And I know there are many of you out there in that position.
If you don’t eat eggs, what about using them for Easter? What are we going to do if there is an egg shortage and we can’t dye eggs. But wait! The egg is an intricate part of the Seder meal too! Well, whoever gets it first can have my eggs!
I was eating pancakes with bacon (I know I should not be eating bacon you can scold me now) and some square piece of meat showed up on my plate. Hark, could it be Taylor Ham? My I have always wanted to try Taylor ham, a southern treat. Sorry friends, not my cup of tea. So I will donate my share to those who really enjoy it.
I normally eat spaghetti and meatballs at Italian restaurants but recently had a big plate of the dish at an American restaurant. And it was quite good! Yes, the red pepper flakes and Parmesan cheese were missing, and it wasn’t as good as so many of my Italian friends can make, but it was an accomplishment to be able to get a good Italian meal at a non Italian restaurant. Mangia my friends.
I have been practicing my Spanish as much as I can recently. Only in America are people not bilingual and speak only one language. I view it as an accomplishment when I can understand bits and pieces of those around me speaking Spanish. My Spanish is Yonkers High School Rose Levine Spanish . Mrs Levine was my teacher and spoke Spanish with a bit of a Yiddish accent. I found learning another language difficult in High School and marvel at the little 5 year olds able to speak and understand multiple languages all around me.
I have a wonderful doctor in New York who happens to do his surgical procedures in New Jersey. I have spent a lot of time recently in the Garden State. I have friends and family in New Jersey. But recently I noticed people in New Jersey are strange too. They never want you to leave their state.
Whether it be the fact that New Jerseyans don’t have to pump their own gas, they are too busy selecting a soda from the hundreds in the WAWA soda dispenser, or stuffed with the WAWA cream cheese pretzels hot and sitting at the checkout , there is something strange about New Jerseyans. But I love them just the same.
And I love you too! I hope you were not subject to the stupid accomplishments Musk/Trump questionnaire. Because I think by reading this column you realize how ridiculous I think the questionnaire is.
And I salute the hard working government employees who make this country great. God bless America, my home sweet home!
Reach Eric Wolf Schoen at ewschoen@icloud.com
