This November, The Alzheimer’s Association Hudson Valley Chapter is offering a free virtual social program for people with dementia and their family caregivers. Something for Alz: Telling Your Story, led by Nancy Kessler of Memoirs Plus, will be held from 11 a.m. to noon on Wednesdays starting Nov. 9.
Kessler said the program will consist primarily of people with dementia sharing memories verbally with their caregivers potentially serving as scribes writing them down. She said the programs may also be recorded for future viewing.
“I think when you hear the word ‘memoir,’ people worry about their memories. I can put people at ease that it’s not a process where you have to know all the facts,” she said. “My general philosophy on writing memories is to write short stories like a paragraph or a few sentences. I find that if you don’t try to go in chronological order, it works better. I have people jump around, and then it fits together later. “
She described how she conducts the sessions. “I always ask some simple questions like ‘How did you get your name? Do you have a nickname? What was the favorite meal that your parents gave you? I usually ask about food because that evokes sensory memories.”
She says the focus on tapping into long-term memories that tend to be stronger. “We try to tap into some of that long-term memory,” she said. “I have a slide, and it would have a picture of a bowl of spaghetti with meatballs, and it would say, ‘Describe a meal you remember your father or mother making?’ The facts don’t matter; we’re just going to share them verbally and then maybe write up some things later.”
She said sometimes the other people in the group mention something that stirs a memory with someone else that they can talk about. “I have an arsenal of prompts that I use. Some will be in slides. Sometimes I ask them to bring a photograph and talk about the photograph.”
She noted that when people attend more that one of the sessions, over time their memories start to fit together into a more cohesive picture. “It builds, so you have a bunch of stories by the time it’s over to give to other generations in your own voice. We can find a way to keep the recordings for each family,” she said. “Do you want to record your memories but don’t have time to write them all down? This is a fun way to get your voice out to your family and loved ones and future generations.”
She described her work with Memoirs Plus as a similar process.
“I interview people and get their stories in their voice and write it up for them and have it printed in a hardcover book,” she said, noting that the books may include old photos, letters, naturalization papers, immigration papers, passports and other mementoes. “The important thing to recognize is that I write in their voice. Maybe they would tell me parts of the story. A woman who was 98 and had pretty severe dementia, but she was able to tell me some things and then her children were able to tell the rest.”
Kessler said her interest in storytelling started when she was a child.
“I was the kid who sat in the corner of the kitchen and listened to the adults telling all the family stories,” she said. “I just always loved telling stories.”
This interest led her to pursue a career in historical museums, and she previously worked as a curator at the Museum of the City of New York. Later she became a therapeutic recreation director for Atria Rye Brook and Greenwich Adult Daycare, where came up with the concept of helping people preserve their memories by writing their memoirs.
She said family stories are important both to the person telling them and their families
“I think the best thing you can leave your family is those stories. Future generations really want your stories. My grandmother would tell me stories, but I can’t tell them the same way. I don’t remember the details. This is something that could make people with dementia feel very useful, it gives purpose to a lot of people.”
To register for Something for Alz: Telling Your Story, call the Alzheimer’s Association at 800.272.3900 or click here. To learn more about Memoirs Plus, click here.
